Greg Gutfeld Annihilates Gavin Newsom in Brutal National TV Takedown

California Governor Gavin Newsom found himself at the receiving end of a savage, unrelenting roast when Fox News host Greg Gutfeld unleashed a televised demolition of his policies, persona, and leadership. For years, Newsom has curated an image as the slick, progressive prince of California, but Gutfeld’s scathing commentary stripped away that sheen in under fifteen minutes.

It started with Gutfeld mocking Newsom’s recent declaration that homeless encampments in his state were “unacceptable” – despite his own policies enabling and expanding them for years. “Which is odd,” Gutfeld sneered, “since he’s the guy who made them acceptable, turning sidewalks into red carpet events for drug addicts, thieves, and unemployed CNN anchors.”

The monologue only grew sharper from there. Gutfeld, known for his lethal sarcasm, ripped into Newsom’s signature hair gel, branding him California’s “self-crowned prince of progressive perfection,” a man whose hair is so slick it “could double as a launch pad for failed policies and slippery sound bites.”

But it wasn’t just personal jabs. Gutfeld systematically dismantled Newsom’s record with a combination of biting wit and stinging truth. On homelessness, he accused Newsom of presiding over a “man-made disaster like Chernobyl or Fox & Friends,” with billions wasted on nonprofits and consultants that achieved nothing but “poop maps” of San Francisco.

When Newsom recently urged cities to clear homeless encampments from sidewalks and parks, Gutfeld compared it to “putting on a condom as you’re leaving a whorehouse,” saying the governor was pretending to fix a problem he spent years denying.

Gutfeld’s takedown moved to California’s economy. Once the fifth largest in the world, the state is now, in his words, “neck-and-neck with mid-tier European nations in a race for the most confusing and punishing tax system.” He mocked Newsom’s economic strategy as something “probably whipped up over brunch, complete with avocado toast and a copy of Marx’s greatest hits.”

Then came education. Gutfeld accused California’s schools of replacing learning with “indoctrination with better graphics,” where parents must decode layers of jargon, social theory, and policies treating biology as a “choose-your-own-adventure story.” School boards, he said, have become ideological war zones burying common sense beneath a mountain of diversity consultants.

No topic was off-limits. From Newsom’s COVID lockdown hypocrisy – dining at French Laundry while shutting down small businesses – to his feeble approach to crime, Gutfeld described a governor “driven by aesthetics, not principles,” a “human screensaver” who is “always moving, perfectly polished, but never actually doing anything of substance.”

Gutfeld mocked California’s rising minimum wage law for fast food workers, noting its odd exemption for chains baking bread as standalone items. “Is the bakers’ union that powerful?” he asked. “If you cross them, will you wake up with a Pillsbury Doughboy head in your bed?”

He saved some of his sharpest lines for Newsom’s national ambitions, calling his potential presidential run “like promoting the chef of a sinking cruise ship to run the Coast Guard.” He painted a vivid image of Newsom as an Instagram politician, crafting slogans and staging photo ops “with the manic intensity of a Real Housewife filming a confessional.”

Even California’s natural beauty wasn’t spared. “The state’s mountains, beaches, and forests,” Gutfeld joked, “are secretly writing anonymous letters begging to be annexed by Idaho just to escape the mismanagement.”

Throughout the monologue, Gutfeld’s comedic timing cut deeper than most political critiques could. While the audience laughed, they also winced, because beneath each punchline was a harsh reality about a state drowning in its own contradictions: gleaming high-tech towers next to tent cities; billionaires funding policies that crush the middle class; climate change blamed for wildfires while corrupt bureaucracy blocks rebuilding permits for years.

He ridiculed Newsom’s rivalry with Florida’s Governor Ron DeSantis as a one-sided bromance gone sour, portraying Newsom as “doom-scrolling Florida headlines at midnight, rage-tweeting between sips of oat milk and existential dread.” While Florida focuses on building infrastructure and attracting businesses, Gutfeld said, Newsom is busy “banning plastic straws and renaming manholes for inclusivity.”

The segment culminated in a surgical takedown of Newsom’s leadership style: “This isn’t leadership. It’s influencer politics. Newsom doesn’t govern. He curates vibes. Every press conference feels like a photo op wrapped in vague buzzwords designed to make people think they’re witnessing greatness when really they’re just watching a TED talk with cheekbones.”

Gutfeld closed with a warning to viewers: California under Newsom is becoming a tragic punchline – and if he ascends to the national stage, the entire country could become the butt of that same joke. His final image was grimly comedic: Newsom offering governance tips to other states while his own implodes, “the political equivalent of losing a race then offering sprinting tips from the stretcher.”

For viewers, it was more than comedic gold. It was a harsh mirror held up to California’s failures under a man whose public image has long outshone his results. And as Gutfeld leaned back with a sly grin, he promised he was nowhere near done with Newsom. After all, when the punchlines write themselves, all you need is a mic and a front row seat to the madness.